Live In My Memory Chapter Three
The next day I chew my lip nervously as I dial the home phone. I am hoping Carrick is there and hasn't went somewhere before work. I really need to talk to him about those pictures. What was written on the back. I'm still confused how someone else knows.
"Hello," a female voice answers the phone, making my eyebrows raise. Carrick has a female over? Since when did he make any new female friends that I didn't know because this woman's voice sounds so unfamiliar to me.
Clearing my throat I close my eyes before speaking. "Is Carrick there?" I ask hoping my nervousness isn't coming through to some stranger who is apparently at the house I share with my husband.
"Yes, hold on a second," the woman replies so casually before I hear soft murmurs in the background. After what seems like forever but in actuality is only minutes I hear Carrick's familiar breathing on the phone.
"Care?" I ask wanting to make sure it is in fact my husband. That I can obviously by now tell his breathing over the phone.
"It's me," Carrick replies and it almost sounds like he is smiling. "Mike and his wife are over. We both have a few hours to kill before work so we decided he'd come over and we'd watch a few movies, smoke some pot," he laughs. "That was his wife who answered."
Hearing Carrick mention Mike, I try to place him, only just barely remembering meeting him one of the many times I stopped by the bar where he and Carrick worked. "I'm glad that was his wife because I was scared," I admit feeling my cheeks go red. I'm blushing even though Carrick can't see me.
Carrick laughs softly at my words, "Avie I would never cheat on you babe," he reassures me. I want to believe him, I really do but a part of me can't. "So why is my lovely wife calling?"
When he asks why I am calling I feel my heartbeat pick up, "Because I was sent mail at my parents house," I blurt out, not even sure how to explain things just yet.
"And that's the reason you are calling?" Carrick asks sounding so confused. I really don't blame him for his confusion.
I shake my head, again knowing he can't see me, "No," I sigh before looking down at the floor. "The mail I was sent was a bunch of pictures of you and Bree out at different places. On the back of one of the pictures someone had written all lies come out eventually."
Carrick goes silent for the longest time. I'm almost afraid he has hung up on me but then he finally speaks. "You didn't recognize the writing?" he asks his voice sounding worried.
"No," I answer as I frown. "I'm just not sure who else knows Care," I sigh as I look away from the floor. "I'm not sure what this person will do with what they know or what they will expect me to do if they decide to say anything else."
"I'm sorry babe," Carrick apologizes his voice sounding concerned. "D..do you want me to try to make it Tulsa to be with you right now?"
Shaking my head I frown, "No," I tell him knowing that I don't feel unsafe. Yes I am scared that someone knows this secret and may reveal it but I don't feel unsafe yet. "I have my family here. If anything gets too bad I can fudge the truth some and tell them bits and pieces."
"Okay, if you are sure," he hesitates a tiny sigh coming across the lines. "If you change your mind or something else happens, call me."
"I will," I smile as I reassure him. Quickly saying goodbye I hang the phone up and stand from the bed I had been sitting on. Leaving the room where I was staying I walk downstairs finding Junia in the living room with Taylor and Natalie's children. I hadn't know Natalie was going to be bringing them over today.
Going to the kitchen I stop when I find my mother in there with Taylor. Taylor is holding Bree in his arms and I hate to admit how content she looks and how right Taylor looks holding her.
Taylor and my mom look up when they hear me at the entrance way of the kitchen, Taylor moving Bree farther up onto his hip, "She was crying so I went to get her up from her nap before mom even had a chance," he smiled making up an excuse for why he was holding my daughter. "I just..I guess I do miss having a baby this small at home."
Hearing him I really hope my face doesn't show all the emotions running through me, the main one being guilt. I feel bad for lying to him, even if I did the right thing. Brennan deserved a dad who could be her daddy without a bunch of drama. Taylor being her daddy would have just cost too much drama for everyone again and I really didn't want to go down that road, not to mention I really didn't want to ruin Natalie and Taylor's family either. A family who he said he would never leave.
"Then maybe you and Natalie can have another one," I laugh before walking over to where Bree and Taylor are. "What do you say to that Miss Bree? Do you think Uncle Taylor and Aunt Natalie should have another baby?"
Bree just smiled wide at me, "Dada," she giggled making my eyes go wide. She said her first word and of course it had to be dada. She had said dada while Taylor was holding her. Oh the fucking irony in that. I think this is one of those times were I may feel like a horrible mother.
Taylor looks at me quickly then down at Bree. I'm half scared now that he is doing the math. That he is realizing she is his child. That he will somehow know Carrick and I never had sex until I was already a few weeks along.
"Was that her first word?" Taylor asks before looking back up at me. "I mean your face it just got that look on it that most parents get when their child says a first word."
I nod my head yes. It is a partial truth anyway because that was her first word but that really wasn't the look that was on my face. "Yeah that was her first word. Carrick's been trying to get her to say dada for a month now," I laugh as I look away feeling guilt again. Carrick has been robbed of hearing her say dada for the first time. Maybe I can just keep this from him though, maybe he will never have to know she said dada while Taylor was holding her.
Taylor frowns at the mention of Carrick trying to get her to say dada. "I...well..I'm sorry he didn't get to hear his efforts paid off," he shrugs before forcing a smile onto his lips, bringing Bree closer to him. "I'm sure she will say it more by the time you get home though and he'll have numerous chances to hear his daughter say dada for him."
"I'm sure she will too," I smile mine too being forced. Slowly I take Bree from Taylor's arms causing him to pout and her to cry. Rocking her on my hips some to shush her I roll my eyes as that doesn't work and she reaches out for Taylor wanting him to take her again.
Taylor smirks at that and looks at me as if he is asking for permission to hold her. "You really should have just left her where she was happy at," he laughs before taking her out of my arms. "Isn't that right sweetpea? Your mama should have just left you with Uncle Taylor."
Bree just babbles having calmed down from her crying, "dada," she mutters softly a smile appearing on her lips as she reaches a hand out to Taylor's lips.
Taylor takes her hand in his and guides it the rest of the way to his lips, kissing it softly, "You need to stop calling me that sweetpea," he smiles as he locks eyes with her. "I'm not your daddy," he whispers before sitting down at the table, holding Bree on his lap.
Sighing I sit down opposite from them, "So, where is Natalie?" I ask wondering why it was him that brought the kids over and not her.
Taylor shrugs finally looking away from Bree, "She got some letter in the mail last night. She wouldn't let me see it but whatever it was it made her mad enough to leave the house in the middle of the night. She hasn't came back or even called to tell me where she is."
"Did you look at the letter after she left?" I ask him curiously. I know Taylor he is a very nosey person.
"No," Taylor shakes his head shocking me. "Though Natalie did say for me to give it to you which is why I came by here but then the kids wanted to play with Junia so I decided to stay."
Raising my eyebrow when he said Natalie told him to give the letter to me I can't help but feel uneasy. "Where is the letter now?" I ask as I stand from the table.
"On the coffee table in the living room," Taylor nods as he looks down at Bree who is babbling. He smiles and starts to babble back at her.
Chewing on my lip I leave the kitchen, going into the living room where Junia is still playing with some of Taylor's children. Seeing a manila envelope I again feel uneasy but walk over to pick it up.
Taking a deep breath I open it and pull out a piece of paper, my heartbeat going faster. What greets me on the piece of paper is results to what looks like a DNA test. A test that says Taylor is Bree's father. Turning the paper over I am greeted again with black ink. This time it says You Should Ask Your Husband About His Dirty Little Secrets.
Putting the paper away quickly I carry the envelope upstairs and into the room where I am staying. It too goes into the drawer with the first one. This new thing adds more unanswered questions like who the hell would do a DNA test on Bree and how could they even have obtained anything of hers to get one in the first place. Whoever this is, it has to be someone who is close but the only other person besides me who knows is Carrick.
At the thought of Carrick doing something like this I sit on the bed, running a hand through my hair. He wouldn't do this to me. I mean yeah he is starting to see more of Taylor in Bree but he still loves me and he wouldn't, but then again who else could know.
Hearing footsteps I look up from my place on the bed, locking eyes with Taylor who now is no longer holding Bree. "I did read it you know," he finally speaks as he shakes his head. "I saw the DNA test and what was written on the back," he whispers. "I didn't want to believe it but the way you look now..it's kind of telling."
Not able to answer him I just look away which just makes him walk farther into the room, shutting the door behind him. The moment the door is shut I close my eyes afraid of what he is going to do or say.
"H..how long have you known Bree was mine Avery?" Taylor asks his voice so calm. "How long have you been keeping this from me?"
Swallowing a lump in my throat I look up at him finally, "Since before she was born," I admit as I feel tears sting my eyes. "Carrick and I never even had sex until after..after I knew I was pregnant."
After I admit that the room goes silent, neither Taylor or I speaking for the longest time. When there is noise again it's the sound of Taylor's fist connecting with the wall before muttering a few curse words. I just shake my head at the hole in the wall. Mom is really gonna love the explanation for this.
"You lied to me," Taylor states through gritted teeth, holding his hand close to him now. "You knew Bree was mine and let Carrick play daddy!" he yells as he shakes his head. "You let another fucking man raise our baby Avery," he laughs as if he would have actually raised Bree with me if he knew the truth. "You let her get attached to Carrick and robbed me of seven months of her life. Hell I never even got to see her come into the world, I had to wait in the god damn waiting room while Carrick watched her take her first breath. How could you?" he asks me as he raises an eyebrow his hand still staying close to his chest.
"I..she needed a dad who wouldn't bring drama to her life," I shrug feeling a few tears go down my cheek. "You being her dad would have been too much. I mean you know what my being with Zac caused," I frown as I shake my head. "I didn't want that again so I figured Carrick would be the easy choice. The choice that no one would freak out over. Anyway you told me the day I left Oklahoma City you'd never leave your family. If Natalie had known then she would have left you and ruined your family. I mean look what happened after she got that."
Taylor finally moves his hand, his eyes locking with mine, "I don't care if it ruined my family. You still should have told me Avery," he mutters so sarcastically. "Does Carrick know or is he too a victim of your lie?"
"He knows," I confirm, keeping eye contact with him. I am afraid of what this new piece of information will do to him.
Taylor glares at me, making me feel like a child, "You both knew? You both decided to play fucking house with my daughter," he whispers so harsh. "Tell me Avery? While you were playing house with him did you ever think about me? How I said I loved you the day you left? Did you ever feel fucking guilty for any of this? I bet you did," he finally stops long enough to breathe. "I bet you felt guilty every time you held Carrick and had to know deep down how Bree was conceived. Had to know the man you were playing house with probably couldn't even get you off like I could," he whispers as he bends down to where I am sitting on the bed. "Carrick must really love you to even touch you after you fucked two of your brothers," he whispers again as he gets in my face. "To know your brothers could fuck you better than he ever could."
"Fuck you," I snap back at him finally shivering at just how close his face is to mine.
It's like my saying fuck you snapped a switch in Taylor though because his eyes take on a new emotion I haven't seen from him. "I'm sure that can be arranged," he answers me back his words coming out angry but his actions proving otherwise as his lips meet mine in a hard kiss. A hard passionate kiss.
The moment he kisses me I feel myself respond back knowing I shouldn't. I should push him away from me. I should be a good wife and stop this but I can't.
Kissing him harder I don't resist it when he pushes me on my back against the bed or when he lays over me, his hands making their way up to the top of my button down shirt. He undoes the first two buttons gently but when he reaches the third he pulls away from the kiss long enough to shake his head and mutter fuck it. His hands tugging with enough force that he rips my shirt open, a few of the buttons literally hitting the floor.
After the shirt is undone he yanks it off of me, his lips soon finding their way to my neck, causing me to moan out.
"You like this?" Taylor whispers on my neck his breath hitting my skin, making me shiver. "You like what I do to you?" he asks another question, his lips leaving a rough trail down my neck towards the bra I have on.
Before I can answer him though I feel him pushing the cups of my bra down, his mouth soon covering one of the erect nipples. God it feels like heaven right now even when he applies pressure with his teeth and bites down. It's rough but not too rough and maybe this is what he wants right now.
When Taylor moves his mouth away I whimper watching as he looks eyes with me again briefly before pulling his shirt off and throwing it to the floor with mine, "Tell me you like this," he speaks again once his shirt is off. "Tell me you like what I do to you," he smirks before leaning down to kiss my stomach his lips making a trail down to my jeans.
"I like what you do to me," I mutter out my body shivering again when Taylor undoes my jeans, pushing them off along with my panties.
His lips again wind up on my stomach though much closer to my hips then before. The closer he gets to my pussy though is when his tongue starts to come out, licking each little bit of skin it comes into contact with.
When Taylor reaches his intended destination I feel my head fall back against a pillow, my hands instantly going down to tangle in his hair which causes him to moan out against me. I can't help but like the way it feels as his hot breath hits my skin down there.
Closing my eyes I keep my head leaned back not even sure how long Taylor plans on staying between my legs. Hell with the mood he is in I am surprised he'd even care about my pleasure but it seems like he is caring, especially when he starts to suck on my clit.
"Fuck," I hiss out feeling one of his fingers work there way inside of me roughly. So much for being gentle for too long. Pulling his hair as his finger starts to work inside of me at a very fast paced rythm I bit down on my lip. Never did I think his fingers would or could be used like this.
When he finally does move away from me I whimper again only to be shushed when his lips come down on mine again. His hands finding mine and putting them on his jeans which I undo for him in a hurry.
"Condom," Taylor murmurs as he moves away from me long enough to reach into his jeans pocket for his wallet. Seeing him find his wallet I am not shocked when I see him produce a condom out of it.
I can't help but look as he opens it then slides it on himself. "It's pink," I laugh before shaking my head.
Taylor glares at me but kisses me anyway, his body adjusting itself to mine. I can feel him right at my entrance. I need him inside of me already.
"Did I say you could talk?" he whispers into my mouth before finally sliding inside of me. Again he isn't gentle and I'm not sure why I thought he would be. Right now he just seems to be taking from me, even if I am giving willingly.
I shake my head no deciding to let him have all the control right now. He can do as he pleases to me and I wouldn't give a crap.
"Didn't think so," he mutters into my mouth as he kisses me harder. His hips seems to be finding a rhytm they like as he moves in and out of me. He is being so rough and when he reaches for my hands again, raising them above my head and pinning me down he only gets worse.
Moaning out I start to move with him, my hands accidentally moving as I do so. Them doing that though makes him just hold on tighter as he continues his rough movements inside of me. I'm starting to think he wants me to be bruises and unable to walk tomorrow.
Closing my eyes I pray that my mom or dad or even Zoe can't hear us, can't hear the way that the bed is now squeaking with our every move. That they can't hear the moans that neither Taylor or I are trying to keep soft and low. I'm not sure now would be a good time for them to find out I have fucked Taylor too. I know they will find out whenever I have to tell them about Bree though maybe just maybe Taylor won't make me. Maybe he will let Carrick and I keep playing house as he put it.
At the thought of Carrick I close my eyes tighter, feeling my orgasm coming on. "Shit Taylor," I whimper out into his mouth not once feeling guilty for what we had just done, even if I had Carrick on my mind as I came.
It doesn't take long for Taylor to follow suit and reach his peak, his body collapsing on top of mine.
"Avie," Taylor frowns after he pulls away from the kiss, his head burying into my shoulder. "You fucking lied to me," he states bringing up the whole situation that seems to have lead to what has just happened between us.
I want to reply to him and I'm about too when my phone rings. He and I both know by that damn Everybody Else song playing who it is calling. It's Carrick, my husband, the man I have just cheated on.
Reaching for my phone I feel Taylor move off of me and the bed. Right when I hit talk the bedroom door slams shut and again I am praying, this time that Carrick didn't hear it. I'm not really looking forward to telling him who it was, though if I do and he asks why I am very prepared to lie. There is no way in hell I can tell Carrick about this, especially not now that I suspect he may be the one behind the letters to Natalie and I.
The next day I chew my lip nervously as I dial the home phone. I am hoping Carrick is there and hasn't went somewhere before work. I really need to talk to him about those pictures. What was written on the back. I'm still confused how someone else knows.
"Hello," a female voice answers the phone, making my eyebrows raise. Carrick has a female over? Since when did he make any new female friends that I didn't know because this woman's voice sounds so unfamiliar to me.
Clearing my throat I close my eyes before speaking. "Is Carrick there?" I ask hoping my nervousness isn't coming through to some stranger who is apparently at the house I share with my husband.
"Yes, hold on a second," the woman replies so casually before I hear soft murmurs in the background. After what seems like forever but in actuality is only minutes I hear Carrick's familiar breathing on the phone.
"Care?" I ask wanting to make sure it is in fact my husband. That I can obviously by now tell his breathing over the phone.
"It's me," Carrick replies and it almost sounds like he is smiling. "Mike and his wife are over. We both have a few hours to kill before work so we decided he'd come over and we'd watch a few movies, smoke some pot," he laughs. "That was his wife who answered."
Hearing Carrick mention Mike, I try to place him, only just barely remembering meeting him one of the many times I stopped by the bar where he and Carrick worked. "I'm glad that was his wife because I was scared," I admit feeling my cheeks go red. I'm blushing even though Carrick can't see me.
Carrick laughs softly at my words, "Avie I would never cheat on you babe," he reassures me. I want to believe him, I really do but a part of me can't. "So why is my lovely wife calling?"
When he asks why I am calling I feel my heartbeat pick up, "Because I was sent mail at my parents house," I blurt out, not even sure how to explain things just yet.
"And that's the reason you are calling?" Carrick asks sounding so confused. I really don't blame him for his confusion.
I shake my head, again knowing he can't see me, "No," I sigh before looking down at the floor. "The mail I was sent was a bunch of pictures of you and Bree out at different places. On the back of one of the pictures someone had written all lies come out eventually."
Carrick goes silent for the longest time. I'm almost afraid he has hung up on me but then he finally speaks. "You didn't recognize the writing?" he asks his voice sounding worried.
"No," I answer as I frown. "I'm just not sure who else knows Care," I sigh as I look away from the floor. "I'm not sure what this person will do with what they know or what they will expect me to do if they decide to say anything else."
"I'm sorry babe," Carrick apologizes his voice sounding concerned. "D..do you want me to try to make it Tulsa to be with you right now?"
Shaking my head I frown, "No," I tell him knowing that I don't feel unsafe. Yes I am scared that someone knows this secret and may reveal it but I don't feel unsafe yet. "I have my family here. If anything gets too bad I can fudge the truth some and tell them bits and pieces."
"Okay, if you are sure," he hesitates a tiny sigh coming across the lines. "If you change your mind or something else happens, call me."
"I will," I smile as I reassure him. Quickly saying goodbye I hang the phone up and stand from the bed I had been sitting on. Leaving the room where I was staying I walk downstairs finding Junia in the living room with Taylor and Natalie's children. I hadn't know Natalie was going to be bringing them over today.
Going to the kitchen I stop when I find my mother in there with Taylor. Taylor is holding Bree in his arms and I hate to admit how content she looks and how right Taylor looks holding her.
Taylor and my mom look up when they hear me at the entrance way of the kitchen, Taylor moving Bree farther up onto his hip, "She was crying so I went to get her up from her nap before mom even had a chance," he smiled making up an excuse for why he was holding my daughter. "I just..I guess I do miss having a baby this small at home."
Hearing him I really hope my face doesn't show all the emotions running through me, the main one being guilt. I feel bad for lying to him, even if I did the right thing. Brennan deserved a dad who could be her daddy without a bunch of drama. Taylor being her daddy would have just cost too much drama for everyone again and I really didn't want to go down that road, not to mention I really didn't want to ruin Natalie and Taylor's family either. A family who he said he would never leave.
"Then maybe you and Natalie can have another one," I laugh before walking over to where Bree and Taylor are. "What do you say to that Miss Bree? Do you think Uncle Taylor and Aunt Natalie should have another baby?"
Bree just smiled wide at me, "Dada," she giggled making my eyes go wide. She said her first word and of course it had to be dada. She had said dada while Taylor was holding her. Oh the fucking irony in that. I think this is one of those times were I may feel like a horrible mother.
Taylor looks at me quickly then down at Bree. I'm half scared now that he is doing the math. That he is realizing she is his child. That he will somehow know Carrick and I never had sex until I was already a few weeks along.
"Was that her first word?" Taylor asks before looking back up at me. "I mean your face it just got that look on it that most parents get when their child says a first word."
I nod my head yes. It is a partial truth anyway because that was her first word but that really wasn't the look that was on my face. "Yeah that was her first word. Carrick's been trying to get her to say dada for a month now," I laugh as I look away feeling guilt again. Carrick has been robbed of hearing her say dada for the first time. Maybe I can just keep this from him though, maybe he will never have to know she said dada while Taylor was holding her.
Taylor frowns at the mention of Carrick trying to get her to say dada. "I...well..I'm sorry he didn't get to hear his efforts paid off," he shrugs before forcing a smile onto his lips, bringing Bree closer to him. "I'm sure she will say it more by the time you get home though and he'll have numerous chances to hear his daughter say dada for him."
"I'm sure she will too," I smile mine too being forced. Slowly I take Bree from Taylor's arms causing him to pout and her to cry. Rocking her on my hips some to shush her I roll my eyes as that doesn't work and she reaches out for Taylor wanting him to take her again.
Taylor smirks at that and looks at me as if he is asking for permission to hold her. "You really should have just left her where she was happy at," he laughs before taking her out of my arms. "Isn't that right sweetpea? Your mama should have just left you with Uncle Taylor."
Bree just babbles having calmed down from her crying, "dada," she mutters softly a smile appearing on her lips as she reaches a hand out to Taylor's lips.
Taylor takes her hand in his and guides it the rest of the way to his lips, kissing it softly, "You need to stop calling me that sweetpea," he smiles as he locks eyes with her. "I'm not your daddy," he whispers before sitting down at the table, holding Bree on his lap.
Sighing I sit down opposite from them, "So, where is Natalie?" I ask wondering why it was him that brought the kids over and not her.
Taylor shrugs finally looking away from Bree, "She got some letter in the mail last night. She wouldn't let me see it but whatever it was it made her mad enough to leave the house in the middle of the night. She hasn't came back or even called to tell me where she is."
"Did you look at the letter after she left?" I ask him curiously. I know Taylor he is a very nosey person.
"No," Taylor shakes his head shocking me. "Though Natalie did say for me to give it to you which is why I came by here but then the kids wanted to play with Junia so I decided to stay."
Raising my eyebrow when he said Natalie told him to give the letter to me I can't help but feel uneasy. "Where is the letter now?" I ask as I stand from the table.
"On the coffee table in the living room," Taylor nods as he looks down at Bree who is babbling. He smiles and starts to babble back at her.
Chewing on my lip I leave the kitchen, going into the living room where Junia is still playing with some of Taylor's children. Seeing a manila envelope I again feel uneasy but walk over to pick it up.
Taking a deep breath I open it and pull out a piece of paper, my heartbeat going faster. What greets me on the piece of paper is results to what looks like a DNA test. A test that says Taylor is Bree's father. Turning the paper over I am greeted again with black ink. This time it says You Should Ask Your Husband About His Dirty Little Secrets.
Putting the paper away quickly I carry the envelope upstairs and into the room where I am staying. It too goes into the drawer with the first one. This new thing adds more unanswered questions like who the hell would do a DNA test on Bree and how could they even have obtained anything of hers to get one in the first place. Whoever this is, it has to be someone who is close but the only other person besides me who knows is Carrick.
At the thought of Carrick doing something like this I sit on the bed, running a hand through my hair. He wouldn't do this to me. I mean yeah he is starting to see more of Taylor in Bree but he still loves me and he wouldn't, but then again who else could know.
Hearing footsteps I look up from my place on the bed, locking eyes with Taylor who now is no longer holding Bree. "I did read it you know," he finally speaks as he shakes his head. "I saw the DNA test and what was written on the back," he whispers. "I didn't want to believe it but the way you look now..it's kind of telling."
Not able to answer him I just look away which just makes him walk farther into the room, shutting the door behind him. The moment the door is shut I close my eyes afraid of what he is going to do or say.
"H..how long have you known Bree was mine Avery?" Taylor asks his voice so calm. "How long have you been keeping this from me?"
Swallowing a lump in my throat I look up at him finally, "Since before she was born," I admit as I feel tears sting my eyes. "Carrick and I never even had sex until after..after I knew I was pregnant."
After I admit that the room goes silent, neither Taylor or I speaking for the longest time. When there is noise again it's the sound of Taylor's fist connecting with the wall before muttering a few curse words. I just shake my head at the hole in the wall. Mom is really gonna love the explanation for this.
"You lied to me," Taylor states through gritted teeth, holding his hand close to him now. "You knew Bree was mine and let Carrick play daddy!" he yells as he shakes his head. "You let another fucking man raise our baby Avery," he laughs as if he would have actually raised Bree with me if he knew the truth. "You let her get attached to Carrick and robbed me of seven months of her life. Hell I never even got to see her come into the world, I had to wait in the god damn waiting room while Carrick watched her take her first breath. How could you?" he asks me as he raises an eyebrow his hand still staying close to his chest.
"I..she needed a dad who wouldn't bring drama to her life," I shrug feeling a few tears go down my cheek. "You being her dad would have been too much. I mean you know what my being with Zac caused," I frown as I shake my head. "I didn't want that again so I figured Carrick would be the easy choice. The choice that no one would freak out over. Anyway you told me the day I left Oklahoma City you'd never leave your family. If Natalie had known then she would have left you and ruined your family. I mean look what happened after she got that."
Taylor finally moves his hand, his eyes locking with mine, "I don't care if it ruined my family. You still should have told me Avery," he mutters so sarcastically. "Does Carrick know or is he too a victim of your lie?"
"He knows," I confirm, keeping eye contact with him. I am afraid of what this new piece of information will do to him.
Taylor glares at me, making me feel like a child, "You both knew? You both decided to play fucking house with my daughter," he whispers so harsh. "Tell me Avery? While you were playing house with him did you ever think about me? How I said I loved you the day you left? Did you ever feel fucking guilty for any of this? I bet you did," he finally stops long enough to breathe. "I bet you felt guilty every time you held Carrick and had to know deep down how Bree was conceived. Had to know the man you were playing house with probably couldn't even get you off like I could," he whispers as he bends down to where I am sitting on the bed. "Carrick must really love you to even touch you after you fucked two of your brothers," he whispers again as he gets in my face. "To know your brothers could fuck you better than he ever could."
"Fuck you," I snap back at him finally shivering at just how close his face is to mine.
It's like my saying fuck you snapped a switch in Taylor though because his eyes take on a new emotion I haven't seen from him. "I'm sure that can be arranged," he answers me back his words coming out angry but his actions proving otherwise as his lips meet mine in a hard kiss. A hard passionate kiss.
The moment he kisses me I feel myself respond back knowing I shouldn't. I should push him away from me. I should be a good wife and stop this but I can't.
Kissing him harder I don't resist it when he pushes me on my back against the bed or when he lays over me, his hands making their way up to the top of my button down shirt. He undoes the first two buttons gently but when he reaches the third he pulls away from the kiss long enough to shake his head and mutter fuck it. His hands tugging with enough force that he rips my shirt open, a few of the buttons literally hitting the floor.
After the shirt is undone he yanks it off of me, his lips soon finding their way to my neck, causing me to moan out.
"You like this?" Taylor whispers on my neck his breath hitting my skin, making me shiver. "You like what I do to you?" he asks another question, his lips leaving a rough trail down my neck towards the bra I have on.
Before I can answer him though I feel him pushing the cups of my bra down, his mouth soon covering one of the erect nipples. God it feels like heaven right now even when he applies pressure with his teeth and bites down. It's rough but not too rough and maybe this is what he wants right now.
When Taylor moves his mouth away I whimper watching as he looks eyes with me again briefly before pulling his shirt off and throwing it to the floor with mine, "Tell me you like this," he speaks again once his shirt is off. "Tell me you like what I do to you," he smirks before leaning down to kiss my stomach his lips making a trail down to my jeans.
"I like what you do to me," I mutter out my body shivering again when Taylor undoes my jeans, pushing them off along with my panties.
His lips again wind up on my stomach though much closer to my hips then before. The closer he gets to my pussy though is when his tongue starts to come out, licking each little bit of skin it comes into contact with.
When Taylor reaches his intended destination I feel my head fall back against a pillow, my hands instantly going down to tangle in his hair which causes him to moan out against me. I can't help but like the way it feels as his hot breath hits my skin down there.
Closing my eyes I keep my head leaned back not even sure how long Taylor plans on staying between my legs. Hell with the mood he is in I am surprised he'd even care about my pleasure but it seems like he is caring, especially when he starts to suck on my clit.
"Fuck," I hiss out feeling one of his fingers work there way inside of me roughly. So much for being gentle for too long. Pulling his hair as his finger starts to work inside of me at a very fast paced rythm I bit down on my lip. Never did I think his fingers would or could be used like this.
When he finally does move away from me I whimper again only to be shushed when his lips come down on mine again. His hands finding mine and putting them on his jeans which I undo for him in a hurry.
"Condom," Taylor murmurs as he moves away from me long enough to reach into his jeans pocket for his wallet. Seeing him find his wallet I am not shocked when I see him produce a condom out of it.
I can't help but look as he opens it then slides it on himself. "It's pink," I laugh before shaking my head.
Taylor glares at me but kisses me anyway, his body adjusting itself to mine. I can feel him right at my entrance. I need him inside of me already.
"Did I say you could talk?" he whispers into my mouth before finally sliding inside of me. Again he isn't gentle and I'm not sure why I thought he would be. Right now he just seems to be taking from me, even if I am giving willingly.
I shake my head no deciding to let him have all the control right now. He can do as he pleases to me and I wouldn't give a crap.
"Didn't think so," he mutters into my mouth as he kisses me harder. His hips seems to be finding a rhytm they like as he moves in and out of me. He is being so rough and when he reaches for my hands again, raising them above my head and pinning me down he only gets worse.
Moaning out I start to move with him, my hands accidentally moving as I do so. Them doing that though makes him just hold on tighter as he continues his rough movements inside of me. I'm starting to think he wants me to be bruises and unable to walk tomorrow.
Closing my eyes I pray that my mom or dad or even Zoe can't hear us, can't hear the way that the bed is now squeaking with our every move. That they can't hear the moans that neither Taylor or I are trying to keep soft and low. I'm not sure now would be a good time for them to find out I have fucked Taylor too. I know they will find out whenever I have to tell them about Bree though maybe just maybe Taylor won't make me. Maybe he will let Carrick and I keep playing house as he put it.
At the thought of Carrick I close my eyes tighter, feeling my orgasm coming on. "Shit Taylor," I whimper out into his mouth not once feeling guilty for what we had just done, even if I had Carrick on my mind as I came.
It doesn't take long for Taylor to follow suit and reach his peak, his body collapsing on top of mine.
"Avie," Taylor frowns after he pulls away from the kiss, his head burying into my shoulder. "You fucking lied to me," he states bringing up the whole situation that seems to have lead to what has just happened between us.
I want to reply to him and I'm about too when my phone rings. He and I both know by that damn Everybody Else song playing who it is calling. It's Carrick, my husband, the man I have just cheated on.
Reaching for my phone I feel Taylor move off of me and the bed. Right when I hit talk the bedroom door slams shut and again I am praying, this time that Carrick didn't hear it. I'm not really looking forward to telling him who it was, though if I do and he asks why I am very prepared to lie. There is no way in hell I can tell Carrick about this, especially not now that I suspect he may be the one behind the letters to Natalie and I.